Letter from Ada with family news and reflections

Date: 1940-01-12
Sender: Ada
Recipient: unknown
Location: Bude Haven
Original scan: 1940-ada-letter-bude-family-news.pdf




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Summary

Ada writes from Bude Haven updating on recent family matters including Joan and Penna's activities, the house warmth, measles increase, schooling of Gillian, and reflections on children's maturity. She expresses concern for Gillian's schooling and mental health while explaining her own efforts to care and support the children. She also mentions local news including a plane crash.

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Transcription

Rosemary Cottage
7 Granville Tce -
Bude Haven :
Jan/Feb 12th 1940

My Own Darling One
Your lovely letter of Sunday is before me. I posted the one I wrote this morning in case this did not reach you by Sunday - but perhaps letters are going better now. I'll post this Thursday a.m. as I used to. So glad you had such a “hot” day Sunday - we must have got that weather on Monday - and I can tell you we made the most of it. Yes, I must have misunderstood about the warmth of the new rooms - I'm quite clear now - and so glad you can and do get them sunny of the west ends. I'm laughing to see it all. What fun we shall have when we do "visit" you. Joan is looking forward to it too. Glad my accounts - or rather estimates were clear. Hope they will work out all right. They should do.
The "Devonshire Cream" play was broadcast once before and we listened to it together I think. Yes the "lion monkey" was very funny. Joan lent me a book about Cornwall & Wreckers - called "Jamaica Inn" by Daphne Du Maurier - Something beginning with M. I think - The country was all right - the Tors etc - all the places we have been to together and it was a terrible story - how much founded on the fact of those terrible wrecking days I don't know - but the people did not speak Cornish - so I did not enjoy the character as I always enjoy all Eden Philpots Character - if only he wrote other than murder stories you'd enjoy them too - The Devonshire Cream was very true and his character studies -

Shall think of you starting to the Annotations tomorrow. We continue to prepare for eventualities. Today have put the long bench (I had made to widen our bed) under the stairs - it and the settle make a nice wide bed - 6 in wider than the stairs - it was 6 in narrower without the bench you see. Penna is getting too long to sleep across ways - her feet might get chaffed off. Now there is a nice wide kennel where Joan & Penna could sleep comfortably all night - if 'all clear' did not sound. Penna had a gas mask practice today. She looks so quaint running round in her motorcycle mask. The 12 cases of measles has increased to 17 now.

I was reckoning today - 5 weeks - and you'd be here in another 5 - but you say April 12 - that is 8 weeks - Well probably the weather will be better then. Wasn't Easter earlier last year yes, I too got quite a thrill seeing Gillian coming & meet me from school.
Regarding Re Venture - she will venture anything. Would do all my shopping and everything else that relates to any intercourse with the outside world - if only I'd let her. Well, I will - and as a matter of fact do - even bills that involve a whole pound note. She said the other day she'd like some pound notes - could I spare her a few!!!
The receipt of the school bill has come - I'll file it. I agree with you. We'll see if Gillian gets any more of this term - if not - in Causton they may reduce the next - but we won't say anything about it.
I'm sorry about Miss Woodruff - she put down "C. of E." in her application - Gillian mourns the loss of her at school and I'm sorry & say does not seem to mind a bit not going back to school just now. Regarding religion - Gillian's prayers are quaint. She rather boasts that she is the "cleverest person in the world" - like the elf "green toe" in one of her story books. I tried to explain to her about not boasting - so she, as she put it, "boasts to Jesus because He loves & hears her boast." Tonight I read & hear the parable of the two men who went into the Temple & pray - etc. She loves me & read the things Jesus says and enjoyed it tonight - but did not take the lesson & treat a bit.
What do you think she said to her dolls the other night? "Now goodnight dears, your mother is dead but I'm here."
Tonight she claims to be the mother of her dolls but their daddy is dead so she wants you to be their Daddy - Is this the way the idea of adoption is dawning on her. She doesn't give the dolls an atom of pity as a Hepburn and takes the substitute parent for granted.
Hayel saw a man with one leg & said "If he had to have one leg why did Jesus not put it in the middle." Gillian saw a man with one leg. She said "What might have happened to the other?" The abnormality of being born with one leg only did not enter Gillian's head - she is too true to nature.
All that you say about our mistake in treating people as mature is very helpful - and I think that is our mistake - Yes, we must come down to their level. Your word "mature" is just what I've been thinking in Mrs Metcalfe words re Joan "you can't put old heads on young shoulders". I've got to be patient with her - she will in time - and only "in time" reach much that I need her to be - But there is more to it than that - the question is will some people even be "mature"? Will Rossiters? for instance.
I expect it is a matter of grey matter (pun!!) And in this we have reason to rejoice in both our children - they have 3 times the grey matter that poor old Joan has - or are already more "mature" - Joan has many insolvable qualities - she is loyal, hardworking, and I believe really loves us all - but I've simply got to accept the fact that she hasn't got a great deal of grey matter. There was a man on the "Shewan Relief Expedition" with Buller. Many have been Mr Keyte ever who said "The trouble is Sawyer, that you are so clever and you expect us to act as you do and when we don't you see red - when actually we haven't the brains to do it". But to get back to your metaphor - I'll try and handle the brush gently and look for the fruit only in its season - As for the under gardener I'll try and keep her & the jobs she can do without damaging the plants - but as a matter of fact she is one of the plants as well and my mistakes has been to look for fruit in time long before the season of it - and not only that but looking for the kind of fruit that it is not her nature to produce - I'll try & come down to their level - The children will "full form is leg" when they are a little older!

Thank you for what you say re the husband-children complex. The bother is that I won't & give better you and them more than I will ever have & give - Of course we will not grudg them their due. But with Gillian I feel I have given & the point of being harmful - and now circumstances again have thrown her on to me - She needs her school of the same as the other children and having to share the teachers so many - However she really is doing much more by herself than ever before. Also I always send her to visit Mrs Parker the Badewife, Miss Puckett & Miss Buller whether there is a message or not - so as to not depend so much on me. Gillian & I are so close that I doubt if I can think anything she doesn't sense - and no matter how happily she may be occupied or playing by herself or even with others, the moment I concentrate on something other than herself she is conscious of it (unconsciously I mean if that is not to give a paradox) and then she simply has to come to me and claim all my attention. This is surely bad - something I feel we ought to be separated for her sake - yet with her nature as it is I feel repressions would be very bad and now she avoids trouble by telling me everything - sooner or later - and I can help her - just some day remark that others might not even notice, show me that her mind is working on something - and we can generally clear up - an label the question & be sorted out later by someone.
It is very hard for me now to be able to take care of it.

Though these dark days. Of course I won't give you all I can when you come. Gillian I expect senses this and feels she is not the centre of my thoughts - so ....
But she loves you so. She said the other day "I love Daddy so much I will even let him go to sleep."
The other night I crept softly into Penna's room to cover her in her sleep (as I thought) - all so quiet then just as I covered her "Bo!" she says - making me jump and then roaring with laughter. She is a quaint child - and so affectionate.


Here stuffed for news. One of our planes crashed in Cambridge - 3 civilians killed - Who? I wonder.
And this morning I rang you up because it said bombs had been dropped in two towns in East England. Well - it is no good ringing you up every time there is anything in the East - I had not heard from Chris for some time - Today I had such a nice letter - so save & sensible - will send it on to you when answered. Now I'll make myself a cup of cocoa & go to bed - Do you give yourself nightcaps? - What do you have - cherry? is it? on a warm drink - How do you sleep? I've been sleeping much better since I put on a thick woolen vest - I never get neuritis now and seem to need so much warmth or I get stiff - How is your side - God keep you - All my love my own darling one - Your Ada.


Thurs A.M
Rained a most intensely bright and unclouded right on 1 o'clock the bedroom - a tidy house - it poured 2 ft high and rolled up the river and looked as though the stream would be flooded.

Peaceful night.

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People mentioned

- Ada
- Joan
- Penna
- Gillian
- Hayel
- Mrs Metcalfe
- Mrs Parker
- Miss Puckett
- Miss Buller
- Mrs Woodruff
- Jesus

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Topics

- family news
- room warmth
- children's behavior
- measles cases
- school
- religion
- gardening
- child psychology

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Uncertain words / phrases

- Annotations
- Devonshire Cream
- lion monkey
- Daphne Du Maurier
- Hepburn
- Causton
- Mrs Parker
- Miss Puckett
- Mrs Woodruff
- grey matter (pun!!)
- Shewan Relief Expedition
- Buller
- Mr Keyte
- Sawyer
- under gardener
- Badewife

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Archivist notes

- Letter dated January 12th, 1940, from Ada at Rosemary Cottage, Bude Haven.
- Mentions children Joan, Penna, and Gillian and their activities, health, and schooling.
- References to local news such as family plane crash in Cambridge.
- Discussion of child's maturity, religious education, and psychological observations.
- Transcript includes some corrections and unclear words noted in square brackets.

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